For and With Others

The Jesuit value of being for and with others calls many of us to make conscious decisions, and in the Jesuit tradition, we reflect on our decisions and outcomes. However, our unconscious decisions may yield impacts equal to or greater than our conscious decisions, and reflecting on those decisions and outcomes may prove to be more challenging. I would like to share two experiences that, I believe, serve as examples of unconsciously being for and with others and the important role of companions in our journey of reflection.

Early in my first semester of teaching at Chillicothe Correctional Center (CCC), the fire alarm went off during class with my residential students. I knew we needed to exit the building, but beyond that, I had no idea if we had a designated spot to which we should report or what my responsibilities were once we left the building. I followed my students’ lead and we lined up away from the building. While talking with my students I glanced around and noticed the staff had assembled in a different area. One of the students then said to me, “It’s okay if you want to move over there.” Without hesitation, I said, “I’m okay right here,” and we continued chatting as investigators searched for the alarm trigger. Later when I shared this story with a Rockhurst companion, she commented that my response was a great example of being for and with my students. It wasn’t until that moment that I reflected on the significance of my decision. I had made the conscious choice to teach inside a correctional facility and was then faced with an unexpected opportunity to either stand in companionship with my students or move away from them. Although I will never know, my actions during the thirty minutes we were outside may have spoken volumes to my students as well as residents not in my class.

A brief conversation both helped me process my actions and deepened my understanding of how I may better serve my companions, especially those with less experience in the Jesuit tradition, e.g., my students. In 2023, Holocaust Remembrance Day fell on the same day as my CCC class. I asked the students if they would be interested in reading the names of the Holocaust victims and their ages, just like we do on the main campus. Unanimously, students agreed to participate. After finishing, the students reflected on the experience and expressed gratitude for the opportunity. One of the comments, which I will never forget, was: “We are here because we committed a crime against society, but the Holocaust victims were innocent. They didn’t deserve what happened to them.” That statement demonstrated her ability to look far beyond her own challenges and embrace the Jesuit value of being for and with others.

Companions serve an important role in our journey of self-reflection. Their insight into both our conscious and unconscious actions should help us more authentically live for and with others.

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